Connect with People Who Meet You On A Lot of Levels

A few days ago, I received a Facebook message from a new Boot Camper, and we ended up having a series of conversations that really stuck with me. Watch this week’s vlog to hear all about it.

Comments

  1. Lois Cignoli

    Several weeks ago I submitted a question and still haven’t received a response. I have done the boot camp but am not on Facebook and feel that somehow that makes a difference. After listening to this week’s I really feel that my concerns are not as important.

    Reply ·
    1. Stephani

      Lois,
      I don’t use Facebook either…are you saying the boot camp is less helpful for you without it? I will seriously reconsider paying for it if my experience without Facebook will be diminished. Thanks for bringing this up…I’m very interested in knowing whether the boot camp will be worth it for me without Facebook. I have the book and if the only way to get community support is through Facebook, it doesn’t seem like it’s worth it.

      Reply ·
      1. Terez

        Stephani, I almost didn’t do bootcamp because of Facebook but I wanted the support so badly I was willing to give it a try. I marked the 30-day refund period on my calendar, fully expecting I’d be asking for the refund. I tolerated using Facebook as the format and I thrived with Bootcamp and (now) Bright Lifers.

        To me, it was worth paying the additional ‘price’ of using FB (and watching videos when I’d have much rather gotten written material) to get the material and the support.

        I have no Facebook friends (by choice) and don’t do anything except BLE on Facebook. The bootcamp house is a secret group and no one outside of your bootcamp (and the BLE administrators) can see that you’re in there. So there’s still a lot of privacy.

        A friend of mine made a Facebook account using a pseudonym so none of her real-life friends would find her on there. She doesn’t have a FB account except for BLE.

        Reply ·
        1. Helen Roberts Spingola

          What’s with this Facebook thing? I am an early boot camper and Facebook was never mentioned, much less an issue! If it had
          been a requirement to join, I wouldn’t have considered it. Have never been on Facebook….

          Reply ·
      2. Katherine Triest

        Hi Lois and Stephani, I too almost didn’t do bootcamp because of Facebook; I not only hate being on line, but once I am on, I can’t tear myself away and play stupid card games (another addiction–needs a bright line!) But I decided I could tolerate it for 8 weeks, and one week in, it’s going fine. I wasn’t able to find someone in person, say through my friends or through my OA group who was interested. Anyway, I’m very happy with it so far, and am finding that the videos themselves are also very supportive. Good luck!

        Reply ·
    2. Susan Peirce Thompson

      Hey Lois. Where did you submit your question? (So I can follow up with my team and we can figure out how we missed it.) And what was it? (So I can answer it for you.)
      I hate that you’ve been kept waiting out in the cold. 🙁
      So much love,
      Susan

      Reply ·
      1. Cynthia K Holland

        So beautiful Susan!

        Reply ·
  2. Amy DiGiostar

    Again Susan you nailed it for me. Everything I think about ends up on a Vlog. Like I keep saying- you’re my long-lost best friend and soulmate. thank you. I never post because I am so scared to reveal what my other struggles are and what causes me to eat but today I’m just going to put it out there and see if anybody else can relate.

    Reply ·
  3. Sonja Anne

    but… dear susan, how to meet such corresponding people on different levels… (what I would love!!)
    I am from germany and here is no bootcamp…

    Reply ·
    1. Terez

      Bootcamp is online, Sonja. You can do it from Germany.

      Reply ·
    2. Sandie Forshag

      I used to live in Germany. Would love to find a way to connect with you.

      Reply ·
  4. MK Nunley

    Lois Cignoli – I am sorry you feel this way – I’m sure your concerns match many others.
    You might consider putting your question right here ! You have my curiosity !! Good
    luck with BLE !! Vr/ MK

    Reply ·
  5. Linda

    Thankyou. I needed this today.

    Reply ·
  6. Jann Kredit

    Wow…I felt so special as a BLE person ….unique….now as a 66 year old white American woman I feel ordinary….lol….oh well. Love you all!

    Reply ·
  7. Annica Brinks

    I am so thankful for boot camp because it happened just as you said. So quickly I found those few people that I share a “kindred spirit” with. I would have never found them without the boot camp. We seem to lean so much on each other that I will often take my concerns to them first rather than the Facebook group. And yes, often I’ll go to Facebook to post something…write something and then delete it because I don’t feel it’s important or that I’ll be understood. I’m loving this journey. It’s over 65 days of bright eating. And over 23 lbs gone! I’m not finding it difficult anymore, it’s very streamlined. I’m physically tired but bright!

    Reply ·
  8. Cassandro Juliana

    Can I start boot camp as soon as I sign up?

    Reply ·
  9. Joanne Hinsperger-Scott

    Good point about stepping outside of our comfort zones and taking that risk to be vulnerable to ask our questions that may or may not be ‘stupid’ in the eyes of others. Or just being brave enough to share, because doing so opens those doors (or windows) for others to see a part of us and allows them to connect. Not always is it going to be positive (as I have learned from past posts), but there are times it is so worth it. There are many kindred souls out there just waiting to connect. And like Susan says, in order to connect with others and UNDERSTAND or GET IT on different levels we need to share. Thanks Susan!

    Reply ·
  10. Thea

    I have a number of concerns about joining a boot camp.
    One – I am a thin person and have been bullied by overweight people my entire life. All the women in my family are overweight, in most places I have worked – I was usually the thinnest, I live in a place where most people are overweight… and even though they’re all telling me that they are “Celebrating their size”, I can tell by the way they look at me and by the constant rejection I feel in their company… they truly loathe me, probably because I the way I look makes them feel bad about themselves. I train 5-6 days a week (not because I have to , but because I enjoy it). I like to move, they like to sit in cafes and eat.
    Now, I need to do BLE to stop the between-meal snacking, stress-eating and chronic food obsessing. But, I really doubt I am going to get support from overweight people, which seem to be the majority of bootcampers.

    Two – this is really a double-edged sword for me. I really hate talking about food and diets with other people, because it exacerbates my own food obsessing. So, even if, by some miracle, another thin and fit person joins this program, having them telling me what they are eating etc. would probably drive me insane, because now in addition to my own crazy food self-talk , I’ll have someone else’s.
    So, finding a kindred spirit is good in theory. But I don’t know if it’s going to work for me…

    Reply ·
    1. Stephanie

      Thea, Often in BLE the focus is NOT on the food. We do not sit around and talk about food. There are no recipe books, etc. People have specific issues and challenges, even with ‘allowed’ food and in my Master Mind group we may talk about it very specifically, and not on-going. We also use the NMF (not my food or drink) because of the triggering possibilities. The central point of the BLE is to write down your food for tomorrow after dinner (while ‘full) and then forgetting all about it until you read it in prep for the next meal. I believe you will receive the support here that you need. There are MANY people at goal weight, and underweight. This is about crazy minds. About HAPPY, thin and FREE. The Freedom from our crazy minds is the goal. You can find a home here. Good luck.

      Reply ·
    2. Claire

      Thea-and all! Isn’t the “outside” of us just an interesting inside journey! I hear you…and I too-imagine I will be just kicking around the walls of my skull if I tune into writing about, weighing, measuring, and connecting to-a community with and over food issues-daily, hourly or minute by minute-even if that doesn’t end up being the topic of choice…it has happened before with weight watchers, overeaters anonymous, and and and…so I too-hesitate. Almost all my friends are thin and active, my sisters too. I happen to be a “froggy woman” up on the BMI scale and the variables of my 4’10” frame, with thyroid issues, age, and never really caring much what I looked like-my incentive to embark on yet another weight loss journey-only to really struggle with the maintenance issue is non-existent..

      Yet-I flutter around the edges…listening to these marvelous vlogs-even some of the ones that are hard for me to relate to-as I am a rural hick. The spiritual work is ongoing, the battle of the brain is ongoing. I marvel at the energy that Susan has…two kids just about did me in! 😉 I desperately want to live-till I die…able to keep doing what I do-which is quite active, varied and engaging. If I’m moving-I’m good-if I try to do brain work-or sit down for a breather-I’m immediately suckered…and then off I go! (You would not believe what I finished off just in writing this!)

      Perhaps-you can just try the first things that Susan recommends…getting rid of sugar and flour. I do know for myself-when I plow through that set of walls-my brain does calm down…it is the maintenance of it that seems to come and bite me in the butt all the time. If you’re content with your weight-then-hey-enjoy it-and keep on movin’ baby! All of us benefit from better nutrition. I too-love to move-but I also love to sit in cafe’s and eat! 🙂 Let no one be too hard on themselves-and let no one be hard on someone else!

      Good luck with whatever choice you make-I understand that thin people are often given the message that they must be “lucky” or “Naturally thin” or any number of comments-which gloss over the fact that there are a whole host of things that can lead to “thinness”-I have some friends that have just been religious about portions, nutrition and exercise their entire lives…it IS a lot of work! I have some-that battle to keep weight on-and it is a battle that I would not want.. blood sugar, stamina and general health for the day to day-is much more precarious-no matter how “good” they look in their clothes. The wonderful gift of “I’m full!” something I’ve never had in my entire life! 🙂 Something a lot of overweight people struggle with I’m finding out!

      I have the most shame-not about my size-but my addictive eating patterns, and for that-I do find intrigue and yes-solace-in hanging out here on the precipice. Either way-I would forgive me-if I was someone else looking in-so I try to do the same as me looking at me. May you can extend that to yourself as well. And if you are being bullied…well-perhaps a new friend (most of us only need one or two!), who likes to move and eats sensibly and enjoys doing what you do-is all you need to be able to face your family and community with humor and grace.

      May all of us find joy in being on this lovely, lovely planet!

      Reply ·
  11. Gail Bryning

    Hello Susan I struggle because I am so picky when it comes to food,taste, and what I like to eat!
    I am checking out Paleo diet as I love avacoto, mushrooms,green onions, olives, turkey,bacon,egg whites. I need sugar so I am trying to use coconut oil,sugar, flour,almond flour cooking my new alternative ingredient treats..

    Reply ·
  12. Jodie Raddatz

    I never could put into words why I was avoiding some friends. That it was such an effort to be with them. I am want deep connections. The vlog was very informative. Thank you.

    Reply ·
  13. Patricia

    Susan, Your presentations are always given in a high level literate form. This one brought a new component to the fore which might have been purposeful or perhaps not. It was, though, very notable to me (having been a speech/language specialist. for 34 years). So please forgive my observation and know that it is hard for me NOT to share my observation.. … As you were telling about your relationship with. this new and wonderful soul, it was as if you slipped back into discourse that might have been common in a different experiential. stage of life. What I am referencing., specifically, is the frequent usage of the word “like “. You may have been fully cognizant of it all, but in case you weren’t , I am just sharing as an observation of a different delivery style which you may or may not choose. Again, please forgive my inability to not comment. and know that I admire you. and I share this with love.

    Reply ·
    1. Joyce

      I, too, found this very distracting from the actual message. Susan, you are a very influential person now, reaching out to many people throughout the world. It’s extremely important that you present yourself in an authoritative manner, while still remaining “real”. I think you can do this without all the “likes” and “ums” that of a less competent person. Also, your welcome this week gave the impression that you were doing something boring but necessary rather than something you were excited to present – the head bobble and eye rolling made you appear as a bored teen doing something she was forced to do.

      Reply ·
      1. Summer

        Hm, interesting. I am very into linguistics, communication styles etc, but missed what you are referencing here – I was too caught up in the message to pay attention to the style I guess!! Great message! I tend to NOT connect easily, and prefer to “go it alone” but this message reminded me how important that connection is. Might listen again and see what you are talking about re: using the words “like/um” though not sure that would bother me, (since I didn’t notice it!!)

        Reply ·
    2. Terez

      She has noticeably reduced the usage of ‘um’ quite a bit in the last couple of months, which I greatly appreciate. Maybe she’ll work on ‘like’ next. 🙂

      Reply ·
  14. Karen Birchfield

    Dear Susan,
    I was in 2014 boot camp and am in another boot camp now. Am I supposed to be in a new FB house? I’m in my old houses – Heart and Heartwood but there is not the energy of starting again or opportunities to join a mastermind group. There are a bunch of old timers there and not much activity.

    I have listened to the coaching calls on Wednesday’s.

    I feel at this time I should just access my existing modules from 2014 and should not have paid to join again.

    Would it be possible for me to receive a refund for this current boot camp and just continue with my info from 2014?

    Thanks

    Reply ·
  15. Lee Epprecht

    I spent years in the classroom teaching children “Just say No!” So there are Susan’s word, “Just say NO!” After careful consideration I decided that is exactly what I need to do. I have spend an entire life time struggling with my weight. Saying :NO” is not so easy when the 4 year old grandchild says, “Grandma!!! I made these just for you! And presents you with an Unicorn specially made for you, frosted in your favorite color, sugar cookie. Ok, so I ate 1/2 the cookie!!! But on August 5th of this year I made the decision to just say NO and began using the Bright Line principles of eating. It has not been perfect but the good news is this morning I weighted in 16 pounds lighter! Thank you, Susan, for all your hard work and your willingness to share!

    Reply ·
  16. Ann Holley

    Hi all ,I shared your concerns about Face book, I am an extreme isolator. How ever long it takes for you to join the tribe of BLE is as long as it takes. I am now at goal weight, am in a private ,secure, BLE Face Book house , find it extremely inclusive and have found 2 buddies who are fast becoming life long friends. I am coming up on my one year anniversary and plan to always stay close to the mother ship. I also know that I will be happy thin and free which is what I have always wanted. Sending love, Ann

    Reply ·
  17. RKS_IN

    Beautiful message, Susan. The connections I’ve made in every boot camp I’ve been through (as a client, as a VIP, and as a Leader), I have seen how the connections are absolutely essential for 95% of the participants. To be understood in a community of like mind with the same goals is priceless. You have created a beautiful, inclusive program with such great success and so many close friendships have blossomed because of it. Thank you!

    Reply ·
  18. Barbara Grace

    Hi Susan. Do you talk about how food impacts mood – particularly which foods can increase dopamine, oxytocin, serotonin and endorphins? This is a particular interest of mine – would love to hear your thoughts on this. Thank you PS love your messages 🙂

    Reply ·
  19. Cynthia

    Your vblog this week reminded me of one of my favorite quotes. “[L)oneliness is not a longing for company, it is a longing for kind. And kind means people who can see you who you are…..” Marilyn French

    thanks!

    Reply ·
  20. Ralph Frymire

    Hi Susan, This is the first vlog I’ve watched. Thank you for being there. I haven’t been on line, although I’m in the 4th week of the bootcamp, because the rules said I had to finish reading your book first. I’m sorry to say I haven’t finished it yet because of my schedule. I also didn’t do the 14 day challenge. I just signed up for the bootcamp and haven’t looked back. It’s the best thing I’ve ever done and the only thing that has ever worked for me.

    Reply ·
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